HILARIOUS quotes involving star trek!

[MetalHead]

have fun.

might be old tho..


http://www.bash.org/?117991

http://www.bash.org/?8291

http://www.bash.org/?7709

http://www.bash.org/?35862

[Sionnach Glic]

That guy in the last one needs to know there's such a thing as a "DVD recorder."

[Foxbat]

I sat through a college Graduation for a friend of mine (in I believe 1990) at Texas A&M Univ, where our esteemed govenor at the time, Ann Richards, actually tried to reference the TOS episode 'Spock's Brain' into her speech. The episode is weak enough as it is, but to hear this old witch try to connect with the young people with that as her bridge was just plain awful.

[Sionnach Glic]

Ouch.
I feel your pain.

[Crushproof]

"Damnit Jim, I'm a Doctor not a Brain Surgeon"

Yes. Actual quote from "Spock's Brain"

[Bryan Moore]

"Damnit Jim, I'm a Doctor not a Brain Surgeon"

Yes. Actual quote from "Spock's Brain"

I had a .wav of that as my "error" message on the old Windows 3.1. Was it said out of irony or purposely? I always found it to be hilarious.

[I Am Spartacus]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQL81lJEL4I

Whose Line Is It Anyway - Star Trek

Sorry, Graham, it's the US version.

[Sionnach Glic]

That was great!

[Teaos]

I enjoy all the "I'm a doctor, not a..." quotes.

[RedDwarfian]

Stolen from a PBP Star Trek RPG, called Obsidian Fleet:

Falkirk's Classic Quotes

"I am Everest, and you are a molehill"

"Ensign, you are so low down the proverbial foodchain that my pet dog, Derek, regards you as a lamp post"

"Are we actually going somewhere Captain, or are we sitting in the middle of space for the sheer hell of it?"

"Bugger Warp Five, if I am not back at Earth in time for my evening golf session, I'm going to destroy a whole star system"

"I SAID RED CARPET AND FLASHING LIGHTS? WHAT ARE YOU - A CARBON ATOM?"

"I hope the next time you go the toilet you pass a hedgehog"

"Sorry Admiral...you seem to have something on your shirt...some kind of loose thread...oh sorry, its your medal..."

"Who is using the duty brain-cell tonight Captain?"

[in response to any criticism] "What's that? You're a fish?"

"Imagine Lieutenant, if you will, Siberia. Then imagine Siberia on the surface of Pluto. Then put Pluto in a black hole. Then make sure the black hole is the dumping ground of the universe's radiation. That's where your going Lieutenant if I don't get my dinner in the next minute"

[in response to COs complaining] "Did you hear something Freeman?"

Falkirk: "I remember meeting your Ambassador last week"
Alien CO: "Ah excellent, so our species can co-operate fully?"
Falkirk: "Not really, I had him liquefied and recast as my deskchair"

"I can cite 230 Regulations supporting my case, running to over 40 pages. You Captain, on the other hand, are threatening me with what is in comparison, a comma"

[at Marine briefings] "Careful, you might develop an idea of your own one day Major"

"If I needed your help Commander, I'd ask for it. Until such time, shut up and stop moaning before I take those rank pips and use them for my next tooth fillings"

"My God Freeman, did you hear that? The Captain wants his ship back....I haven't laughed so hard since I ordered the dismissal of the entire Antillian delegation because their skin colour didn't match my outfit"

"Come along Admiral, we've got a planet to save before lunchtime and we're not doing it with you sitting around looking like someone has emptied a plate of gagh into your trousers"

[on hearing a refugee's desperate story of 5 weeks adrift with only small rations to eat] "Moving, moving....5 whole weeks with no caviar and champagne..Freeman...I'm telling you, this Federation has the wrong priorities.."

"Right that's it....Freeman, hit him for me. I just had my nails done"