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| Name | Caption |
| Bird of Prey | Stadi: ''You want a kiss? I would rather kiss a Klingon!'' Paris: ''So would I, but I still have to wait a few seasons for that.'' |
| Name | Caption |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Paris: “Listen… You’ve GOT to go out with him… I’ll give you a weeks replicator rations. He’s driving me NUTS! He was in my quarters this morning. He woke me up playing “Everybody Hurts” on his clarinet!” |
| Miss Marple | Sexual harassment ... IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE! |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Stadi: "Tom... I'm Betazoid. I hear EVERYTHING you are thinking. ...and you're a dirty, dirty little man." |
| Miss Marple | Tom: Do you know what I'm thinking? Stadi: It doesn't take a Betazoid to know what YOU are thinking. |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Stadi: "Tom, will you LEAVE ME ALONE." Paris: "Wait a sec... YOU'RE the one in the Men's Room." Stadi: "Fine. At least use a different urinal." |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Stadi: ♪"There's Klingon's off the starboard bow, starboard bow..."♫ Paris: "Technically, I'm off the port quarter..." Stadi: "Shut up... you're still a Klingon." |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Paris: "Stadi... do you like movies about gladiators?" Stadi: "What the hell are you talking about?? LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!" Paris: "So, you DON'T like movies about gladiators?" |
| Chromedome | "Is that fake news?" |
| Mikey | "Tom, why are you biting my neck?" "Well, how exactly did you think the crew survived unchanged all these years in the Delta Quadrant?" |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Paris: "Stadi... What are you thinking?" Stadi: "I'm trying to figure out if that unnatural relationship you have with Harry is a really freaky friendship or a seriously scary Bromance." |
| MLCoolJ | Paris: Now put the black 8 on the red 9. Stadi: Yes, Paris, I know how to play Solitaire. |
| MR. WORF | Stadi : I wanted to tell you ... Good Luck ... And we're all counting on you. |
| Frankie Chestnuts | A romantic evening on the Holodeck. It seems harmless enough. Until Mr. Paris becomes a bit too forward and ends up wearing a plate of Neelix’s Talaxian worm hair pasta. This ultimately results in Mr. Paris’ evening… and uniform, to be a total loss. . We've seen almost everything, so we know how to cover almost anything. . We are Farmers Bum-Da-Bum-Bum Bum-Bum-Bum |
| mwhittington | Paris: You. Me. Hot tub. Champagne. Stadi: You. Alone. Hot tub. Plasma conduit. |
| Miss Marple | Tom sidles in to try to attempt the "Kirk Maneuver". |
| EMH_MkI | Narrator: Only redshirt one will survive. Who will it be!? Find out... RIGHT NOW!!! |
| Bird of Prey | Paris: ''Today is Kiss-The-Pilot-Day.'' Stadi: ''Funny, I thought today is Punch-The-Copilot-Day.''' |
| AJ | Sexual harassment.... IN SPACE |
| Niall Johnson | Oh Cool! One of those alien parasite gills! |
| MLCoolJ | Paris: I know I've been a bit of a playboy and I've never taken relationships seriously...but for you, I'm willing to go "Stadi". (laughs) Get it? "Stadi"? Stadi: Must...resist...urge...to kill...him... |
| Chromedome | (Outrageously fake French accent) "Can I tempt you with one, small, wafer thin mint?" |
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