Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 2:39 am
found this one
A man walks into a bar and says ouch.
Page 4 of 143
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 2:40 am
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 2:48 am
Nickswitz wrote:found this oneA man walks into a bar and says ouch.
Nice.
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 3:33 am
2 peanuts walk into a bar.
One was a salted.
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Jun 21, 2008 4:06 am
a: My dog has no nose.
b: Then how does he smell?
a: Awful!
(cookie for the reference)
b: Then how does he smell?
a: Awful!
(cookie for the reference)
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2008 4:20 pm
Who is a pirate's favorite Star Trek character?
Yarrrr!
Yarrrr!
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2008 5:53 pm
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Oct 18, 2008 12:21 am
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Oct 18, 2008 7:26 am
1 LOL and 1 ROLL - I can live with that response
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sat Oct 18, 2008 12:45 pm
Ah, but don't they both cancel each other out? 
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 8:07 pm
Guy goes into a bar and sees two pieces of meat nailed to the ceiling. He asks the bartender what's up with the meat.
"It's a standing bet we have here," says the bar tender. "You get one chance to jump up and rip both pieces off the ceiling. If you win, you get free drinks every night for a week. If you lose, you buy everybody else free drinks for a whole night. Interested?"
The guy looks up, thinking about it, then says "no, I don't think so... the steaks are too high."
"It's a standing bet we have here," says the bar tender. "You get one chance to jump up and rip both pieces off the ceiling. If you win, you get free drinks every night for a week. If you lose, you buy everybody else free drinks for a whole night. Interested?"
The guy looks up, thinking about it, then says "no, I don't think so... the steaks are too high."
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 8:23 pm
At first I was thinking "what, I don't get it". Then I got it.
Very nice.
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 9:20 pm
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Mon Oct 20, 2008 3:29 pm
Ouch.
Re: The Joke Thread
Posted: Mon Oct 20, 2008 7:46 pm
Medical guy called Dave is working in his surgery one day when this female patient comes in. He can't take his eyes off her, he's instantly turned on... and from the little looks she seems to be giving him, he gets the impression that she's up for it too! As he goes to get her some medicine a little devil appears on his shoulder...
"Dave, go for it! She's gorgeous, it's been a long time since you got any sex, there's nobody else in the office, she's clearly into you too... do it Dave, take her roughly from behind right here in the surgery!"
Then a little angel appears on his other shoulder. "For God's sake Dave, you can't do this!"
"Well... why not?" Mutters Dave finally, completly torn.
The angel sighs. "Well if nothing else, there's the fact that you're a vet!"
"Dave, go for it! She's gorgeous, it's been a long time since you got any sex, there's nobody else in the office, she's clearly into you too... do it Dave, take her roughly from behind right here in the surgery!"
Then a little angel appears on his other shoulder. "For God's sake Dave, you can't do this!"
"Well... why not?" Mutters Dave finally, completly torn.
The angel sighs. "Well if nothing else, there's the fact that you're a vet!"