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Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 12:08 am**

sunnyside wrote:
- The Franco-Prussian War
- Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

- World War I
- Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States [Entering the war late -ed.]. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

- World War II
- Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

- War in Indochina
- Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

- Algerian Rebellion
- Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

- War on Terrorism
- France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/france.html

P.S. I'm about 1/32nd french on my dad's side, but I like to think it helps calm the Commanche and Irish parts...

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 12:14 am**

stitch626 wrote:Lets blame something on Americans...

Discusting fast food, that's America's fault.

What disgusting fast food? At least we aren't as stuck up as Europe and all their weird accents

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 12:19 am**

Don't forget the weird accents right here at home. Go to Alabama (no offense Alabamians) and try to follow a conversation. And then there's New Jersey

(Hi Mikey).

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 3:08 am**

Regarding the British 'defeat' in the American Revolution, logistics had just as much to do with it as any quality on the American's part. Keep in mind that until France signed on to assist the Colonies they were not doing so well, especially in the tradition combat of the day.

Your belief that America saved the World in both WW 1 & 2 is humorous but only a part of the true story. In both cases the War had been going on for many years and in the case of WW 1, much of the German Troops serving by that point were elderly or children. You were a valuable ally but you did anything but win on your own. As to WW 2, had Britain and in particular the RN and RAF not held out as they did then there very well could have been no island from which to launch D-Day, which you were also only a part of not the whole. It is also important to remember the contribution our Soviet Allies put forth, had Hitler not opened a second front and dedicated his resources soley on the Western Front then things again could have been very different. What I am getting at is that a whole serious of events went into winning both wars with all nations contributing to their successful resolution, rather than the American we saved the world attitude.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 6:02 am**

KuvahMagh - chill, my hoser friend. What Sunny posted was a joke. A truly excellent joke, Sunny. "The Dien Bien Flu." Ha!

Seafort - sorry top bring this up after the fact, but did you say that the British army had riflemen in the 17th century? Wouldn't one of the requirements for having riflemen be "existing in the same time frame as rifles?"

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 8:16 am**

Mikey wrote:Seafort - sorry top bring this up after the fact, but did you say that the British army had riflemen in the 17th century? Wouldn't one of the requirements for having riflemen be "existing in the same time frame as rifles?"

Pft, 17th century/1700s, same thing. I of course meant the 18th century.

Incidently, I think there were examples of rifles in the 17th century, but they didn't become widespread military equippment until the late 18th.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 8:35 am**

The North American colonies were operating at a financial loss at the time of the revolution, so Britain would have been better off abandoning them in the mid 1770s. The only reason we stayed on the continent at all was because the loyalists insisted on it.

Hahahah, so the colonial elites getting tired of the British elites controlling and taxing everything, resulting in a revolt, is now our fault? An interesting spin, to say the least.

The interesting thing brought up in this tangent, though, is the help the U.S. received from the French, which certainly seems to go largely unacknowledged to as great a degree as possible today. Certainly the argument can be made that the French were merely taking advantage of an opportunity to sabotage Britain's colonial network as a colonial competitor and there is certainly truth in that. But it's interesting that people today seem to relish the shared urban legend that France both never had an important, powerful global colonial empire, and that France never had any respectable military power to speak of. And perhaps more on the "disturbing" level, at least politically speaking, is the idea that we can and should utterly disregard any people who are not known globally for their current military prowess, as if that is the sole paramount criterion upon which to consider someone a respect-worthy member of the global community. (And we wonder why every third world dictatorship falls over itself trying to get arms and nukes?)

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 8:38 am**

I like to bring up the fact that America wouldn't exist if it weren't for France all the time in political discussions.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 10:59 am**

Here's something for people to try. Go to Google, type in "French military victories", and click 'I'm feeling lucky'.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 11:11 am**

French military victories

Oxymoron?

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 1:05 pm**

I don't think the French involvement in the success of the American Revolution is as undervalued as Dusk seems to think. Most folks I know with at least a passing and intelligent interest seem to know of the part played by LaSalle, de Grande, etc.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 1:51 pm**

I always find it funny when Americans think the French owe them one for WWII. Always seem to forget that with out the French they would still be part of the common wealth.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 4:36 pm**

Teaos wrote:I always find it funny when Americans think the French owe them one for WWII. Always seem to forget that with out the French they would still be part of the common wealth.

What's the common wealth? Isn't that the government from Andromeda?

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 4:40 pm**

Yes it is the name of the Pre-Fall Andromeda Government but in the real world the Commonwealth of Nations is a body created with the dissolution of the British Empire, it now serves mostly as a Diplomatic/trade Alliance with no direct control over the way a member government operates.

Posted: **Sun May 25, 2008 4:47 pm**

After WW1, the British Empire changed its name to the British Commonwealth.

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