The problem with Trump jokes:
Republicans don't think they're funny, and Democrats don't think they're jokes.
https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments ... ump_jokes/
The Joke Thread
Re: The Joke Thread
"Bible, Wrath of Khan, what's the difference?"
Stan - South Park
Stan - South Park
Re: The Joke Thread
An Englishman, a Scotsman, a Welshman and a Irishman are captured by Isis.
The executioner lines the men in a row and says that each of them can have one final wish. He starts by asking the Irishman what his wish is.
"My wish is to have 1000 Irish tap dancers tapping during my execution."
"Granted." The executioner replied and then proceeded to ask the Scotsman his wish.
"My wish is to have 1000 Scotsman playing the bag pipes during my execution."
"Granted." Replied the executioner, and went on to ask the Welsh man.
"My wish is to have 1000 Welshman singing Land of my Farther during my execution."
"Granted." Said the executioner, before finally asking the English man what his final wish was to be.
"Kill me first."
The executioner lines the men in a row and says that each of them can have one final wish. He starts by asking the Irishman what his wish is.
"My wish is to have 1000 Irish tap dancers tapping during my execution."
"Granted." The executioner replied and then proceeded to ask the Scotsman his wish.
"My wish is to have 1000 Scotsman playing the bag pipes during my execution."
"Granted." Replied the executioner, and went on to ask the Welsh man.
"My wish is to have 1000 Welshman singing Land of my Farther during my execution."
"Granted." Said the executioner, before finally asking the English man what his final wish was to be.
"Kill me first."
"Bible, Wrath of Khan, what's the difference?"
Stan - South Park
Stan - South Park
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Graham Kennedy
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Re: The Joke Thread
I LOLed
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. SET a man on fire, and you will keep him warm for the rest of his life...
Re: The Joke Thread
My girlfriend said that she had slept with 61 men before me.
I doubted that but, she insisted I was her sixty-second man.
I doubted that but, she insisted I was her sixty-second man.
"Bible, Wrath of Khan, what's the difference?"
Stan - South Park
Stan - South Park
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Graham Kennedy
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Re: The Joke Thread
My wife says I’m unsophisticated and uncultured, so to prove her wrong, guess where I’m taking her. Hint: It starts with “B” and rhymes with “wallet.”
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. SET a man on fire, and you will keep him warm for the rest of his life...
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Mikey
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Re: The Joke Thread
Could be a joke, or could be just how Brits pronounce the word...
I can't stand nothing dull
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
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IanKennedy
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Re: The Joke Thread
We pronounce it just like the french do. Without the silly accent.Mikey wrote:Could be a joke, or could be just how Brits pronounce the word...
email, ergo spam
Re: The Joke Thread
What happens if you skip school in Middle-Earth?
You shall not pass!
(Sorry.)
You shall not pass!
(Sorry.)
"Bible, Wrath of Khan, what's the difference?"
Stan - South Park
Stan - South Park
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Mikey
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Re: The Joke Thread
Trying to think how this is a joke, because we say it that way too...IanKennedy wrote:We pronounce it just like the french do. Without the silly accent.Mikey wrote:Could be a joke, or could be just how Brits pronounce the word...
Ouch, my covfefe.Nutso wrote:What happens if you skip school in Middle-Earth?
You shall not pass!
(Sorry.)
I can't stand nothing dull
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
-
Graham Kennedy
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- Posts: 11561
- Joined: Mon Jul 09, 2007 2:28 pm
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Re: The Joke Thread
My (imaginary) girlfriend thinks I'm unsophisticated and uncultured. I'm proving her wrong by taking her to the ballet... but I don't even know how "ballet" is pronounced, thus proving her point. Irony, see?Mikey wrote:Trying to think how this is a joke, because we say it that way too...IanKennedy wrote:We pronounce it just like the french do. Without the silly accent.Mikey wrote:Could be a joke, or could be just how Brits pronounce the word...
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. SET a man on fire, and you will keep him warm for the rest of his life...
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Mikey
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Re: The Joke Thread
Yeah, I got that. I was referring to Ian's jibe.
I can't stand nothing dull
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
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IanKennedy
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Re: The Joke Thread
What jibe? I mearly answered your query about how it was pronounced.Mikey wrote:Yeah, I got that. I was referring to Ian's jibe.
email, ergo spam
Re: The Joke Thread
John was unable to choose between two girls...
So he asked his friend Gary for help deciding which girl to be with.
John: I'm devoted to Kate but Edith is my dream girl, she's all I've ever wanted.
Gary: Then you should be with Edith.
John: But I love Kate and could never leave her...
Gary: Then you should stay with Kate.
John: But I also want to be with Edith, I can't miss this opportunity!
Gary: You can't have your Kate and Edith too.
So he asked his friend Gary for help deciding which girl to be with.
John: I'm devoted to Kate but Edith is my dream girl, she's all I've ever wanted.
Gary: Then you should be with Edith.
John: But I love Kate and could never leave her...
Gary: Then you should stay with Kate.
John: But I also want to be with Edith, I can't miss this opportunity!
Gary: You can't have your Kate and Edith too.
"Bible, Wrath of Khan, what's the difference?"
Stan - South Park
Stan - South Park
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Graham Kennedy
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Re: The Joke Thread
Oh god...Nutso wrote:John was unable to choose between two girls...
So he asked his friend Gary for help deciding which girl to be with.
John: I'm devoted to Kate but Edith is my dream girl, she's all I've ever wanted.
Gary: Then you should be with Edith.
John: But I love Kate and could never leave her...
Gary: Then you should stay with Kate.
John: But I also want to be with Edith, I can't miss this opportunity!
Gary: You can't have your Kate and Edith too.
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. SET a man on fire, and you will keep him warm for the rest of his life...