Dear...

[McAvoy]

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns


Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic


Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's a bitch.
Sincerely,
The Titanic


Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada


Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely,
Google


Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF
happened?!
Sincerely,
1985


Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can't touch this.
Sincerely,
That Little Triangle


Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea...Just kidding!
They're all dead.
Sincerely,
BP


Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Sincerely,
God


Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely,
Stevie Wonder


Dear Nickleback,
That's enough.
Sincerely,
The World


Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black people


Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain.....no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin


Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents Everywhere


Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely,
Superman


Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies


Dear Global Warming,
You're the best imaginary friend ever!
Sincerely,
Al Gore


Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol


Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars ends there because
some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans


Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans


Dear iPhone,
Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words into nice words. You
piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User


Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,
Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die. CRAP! Where did you go?
Sincerely,
Terrified


Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore


Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant


Dear Dr. Phil,
Look man, there's only room for one fake doctor in this world and I was
here first.
Sincerely,
Dr. Pepper

[Mikey]

Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant

Uh, yeah.

Wait, was that rhetorical?

Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,
Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die. CRAP! Where did you go?
Sincerely,
Terrified

I believe Jon Entwistle said it best.

[Griffin]

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada

Dear Canada,
Two words. Celine Dion.
You started it.
Sincerely,
America

[Mikey]

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada

Dear Canada,
Two words. Celine Dion.
You started it.
Sincerely,
America

Thanks for the assist there, Griffin.

[shran]

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada

Dear Canada,
Two words. Celine Dion.
You started it.
Sincerely,
America

Thanks for the assist there, Griffin.

It's even worse when you consider her carreer was launched by Eurovision, when she represented Switzerland.

[Captain Seafort]

Dear Weightwatchers,
Am I doing this right?
Sincerely
Bobby

[McAvoy]

You know the Twlight one is obvious but never clicked in my head for some reason. But the same argument can be said for fans of True Blood.

[Mikey]

True Blood.

Or, as I like to call it when my wife watches it, "HBO presents What the Fuck is Going on?"

[McAvoy]

Yeah me too. I honestly tried watching it but just can't get into it.

To me it feels like Twilight The Series but without the sparkly or teen crap.

[colmquinn]

Yeah me too. I honestly tried watching it but just can't get into it.

To me it feels like Twilight The Series but without the sparkly or teen crap.

Ditto

[Tsukiyumi]

Or, as I like to call it when my wife watches it, "HBO presents What the Fuck is Going on?"

I can't really judge without watching it, but honestly, I felt a bit like that when I first started really trying to follow Star Trek... season 5 of DS9.

[Mikey]

No comparison. In "True Blood," they just add shit for no apparent reason. Vampires? No, we added a were-dog too. Wait, then there's the actual werewolves. Wait, then there's a psychic cult leader. Wait, then there's...

[Reliant121]

I think the problem with True-Blood is that it only makes the remotest bit of sense if you watch it from the very beginning. I know most of our English teachers are obsessed with it.

[colmquinn]

... I know most of our English teachers are obsessed with it.

They are clearly witches and must burn for their terrible crimes.

[McAvoy]

Yeah I'd rather watch Game of Thrones on HBO. But if I had to choose between Twilight and True Blood, I'll watch True Blood. Actually I'd rather do jello wrestling with the Golden Girls than watch Twilight (cookie for anyone who knows the quote).