What's the latest in people's lives?

[Mikey]

Abusing the brain-dead: the pastime ofanyone with a couple of functioning brain cells since 3500 BCE.

[Mark]

Abusing the brain-dead: the pastime ofanyone with a couple of functioning brain cells since 3500 BCE.

Let me regale you with one of my recent abuses of the brain dead.

Me: Aloha, thank you for calling (yada....yada...yada....) how may I direct your call?

Her: I don't know.

Me: Well, ma'am, which department did you need to speak with?

Her: I'm not sure.

Me: We have three general departments; Sales, Service, or Parts.

Her: Any of them I suppose.

Me: Well, ma'am what kind of vehicle do you have?

Her: A toyota.

Me: Was this a used car?

Her: No, I bought it new.

Me: We don't sell new Toyotas ma'am.

Her: Yes, you do.

Me: We only sell new Mercedez Benz, Jaguars, Porsches, and Land Rovers Ma'am.

Her: So?

Me: Ma'am,I'm not sure how to assist you.

Her: (getting bitchy) Just transfer me to somebody who can help me!

Me: Very well, please hold.

And I transferred her to 411 (city information)

DUMBASS

[Mikey]

I have to admit that once a few weeks ago, we were inundated by "tire-kickers;" i.e., people who waste our time and aren't really in the car-buying process. Having been pretty fed up with this already, I ran into an older couple who were trying to gather information to aid their adult daughter purchase a vehicle somewhere in another state. When they said, "We're looking for our daughter," I answered (quickly enough so they couldn't be sure) "Sorry, I haven't seen her."

[Mark]

NICE!!!

[Lt. Staplic]

[Sionnach Glic]

Nice one.
Though now it just means she'll phrase her equestion more corerctly.

[Nickswitz]

I don't one which is funnier the actual situation or the fact that it took me 5 minutes to get the joke
Lol
I'm glad I don't have a job, lol
I've now made a decission, in about 2 months I will be getting the samsung omnia, to replace my current phone. The phone I have now hates me with a passion, so I'm not even waiting for the 2 yr contract to be up
Lol
At this point I really miss school, or at least people from school. So I can't wait til next week when I go back.

[Lt. Staplic]

how are you going to buy the phone if you don't have a job?

[shran]

parents are a lovely aset in that case. Or perhaps some birthday money left over, or other sources.

[Lt. Staplic]

ya I guess so.

[Tsukiyumi]

To continue from another thread, my Grandma wanted to give me her house down in Sugar Land, but my uncle and aunt want to sell it. My uncle went up to my Grandma's assisted-living apartment last night and showed her that she'd signed paperwork letting the Realtor show the house for another four months...

...So, my Grandma told me I have $90,000 at my disposal to buy a house somewhere else.

Take that, you greedy s.o.b.! It helps that my Grandma knows me pretty well; knows I'd never ask for something like that. She knows I'm honest, and possibly the best person in the family. I was also the first grandkid, and her favorite. My head is spinning, honestly. This is a hell of a stroke of luck; I guess it's balancing out all of the awful luck I've had the rest of my life.

[Mark]

Dude, with that kind of scratch you can get a damn nice start.

[Captain Picard's Hair]

Wow, that's amazing Tsuki! I'm happy for you - way to those bastards

(I'm just reminded of that Seinfeld ep in which George is working with Houston Astros reps while working for the Yankees and finds out that "bastard" is a common refrain down there)

... so the best to ya, ya bastard!

[Captain Seafort]

Congratulations Tsu - here's hoping it's an omen for the next year's fortune and beyond.

[Mark]

Buy a $60,000 house, and then fly the out for the housewarming! But save some for bail later