| Name | Caption | 
| Frankie Chestnuts | Archer, getting his ass kicked again. This time, by water. | 
| jg | I kinda got a feeling this isn't what's meant by keeping the caption competition fairly clean. | 
| Mr. President | "Thank god this didn't happen during the colonic." | 
| Ktasay | COLD!!! When are they going to invent a shower using sound instead of water! | 
| Mr. President | Burst water pipe in your spaceship? No artificial gravity? Call the Super Mario Bros. on 1-800-POW-ERUP. (Service not available in the Mushroom Kingdom) | 
| sentinel64 | Cpt Archer: Tucker... why do you always check the gravity system when I am taking a shower. Tucker (over intercom): Captain... I hope you are enjoying the moment... and in a couple minutes... you'll be all wet (HA! HA! HA!)
 | 
| Frankie Chestnuts | Archer: "Archer to Engineering... Very funny, Trip... Ha, ha, ha... How would you like to be scrubbing plasma conduits for the next month? TURN THE GRAVITY BACK ON!! NOW!!" | 
| Frankie Chestnuts | Archer: "How's this Shatner? I managed to get my shirt off again! AND this is my REAL hair!" | 
| tuvoc74656 | ...dont ask where trip is... | 
| Mr. President | Despite technical difficulties, Captain Archer attempts to cleanse himself of deep space grime. | 
| Bird of Prey | Archer: 'Wait, this isn't the transporter platform!' | 
| RandomDude | It's a good thing I'm not using the toilet... | 
| Sondak | Sudden loss of artificial gravity is a sharp lesson to those who pee in the shower. | 
| PHRobertson | "Hmm... when gravity gets restored, this water's gonna end up all over the floor. I wonder if Phlox'll let me borrow his Squeezy-Mop of Awesomeness..." | 
| The Geek | Archer reenacts the time he spent in a Turkish prison. Notice the smile. | 
| Mr. President | "I really ought to stop going to those zero-gravity bukkake parties." | 
| Mr. President | Archer: (into comms) "Trip, the artificial gravity has gone on B deck, I need you to fix it as soon as possible." Archer (internal monologue) "WHHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! WOOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!"
 | 
| Mr. President | In space no one can hear you steam. | 
| Frankie Chestnuts | Archer: "Aww... Dammit! PORTHOS!! Bad boy! BAD BOY!" | 
| mwhittington | Archer: I'm floating, I'm wet, and I'm naked... Oh, yeah, I KNOW how to have a good time! | 
| Bird of Prey | Sorry, hetero-males & lesbians, nothing here for you today. | 
| Mr. President | "At least I'm not cleaning the chemical toilets on C deck right now. Poor Trip..." | 
| The Geek | As you can see, this is indeed a shower scene, but with a distinct lack ok of T- Pol, and far too much Archer. Is there any doubt why this show got cancelled?
 | 
| Mr. President | Not pictured: Jolene Blalock. |